Maybe it needs to be closer to the window.

Maybe the cardinal direction is not quite right.

Does my apartment have the right place for it?

piano and music sheetAfter I moved my electric piano to a different location, I played a little bit. Nah, I’m still not feeling it. It needs to find a new location…but where?

In past years, I relocated the piano from left to right many times in my little living room because something was not working. It didn’t give me joy as it used to. My piano skill level used to be decent, but not anymore. It’s a typical example of a vicious cycle. Because I didn’t feel it, I didn’t play much. The less I played the piano, the more rusty my skills became. The deterioration was palpable. Eventually, the electric piano became the elephant in my living room. Still, I played it for a couple of minutes at least once a year regardless of how badly I played. I just couldn’t cut all ties with my piano yet.

When the year 2022 arrived, I reluctantly removed the piano cover as usual and stared at the sheet music.

Did I really play any of these?

All of the pieces looked more unfamiliar than ever. I flipped sheet after sheet because they seemed way too advanced for my skills, which made me start questioning myself. What am I doing? Maybe it’s all futile. Maybe it’s time to call it quits. Then, a sheet of Chopin’s music caught my eyes. I still remember this! I sat up straight, placed my hands on the keyboard, and started playing. My comprehension of the score was pretty bad. My fingers didn’t move as smoothly as they used to. My skill was pretty rusty, but — something clicked for the first time in a long time. Finally, I felt it was right. One by one, good old memories started coming back while I was playing. The day when I was seven and my little upright piano was delivered to my house. The year I played the piano for my friends in Canada every afternoon. The day I got this electric piano… I immersed myself, feeling jubilant. Before I realized it, hours had passed. Since then, I’ve been playing the piano almost every day…5 minutes here, 30 minutes there. I’m still bungling, but it doesn’t matter. It delights me.

The location was not the problem after all. The state of my mind was. I don’t think I was depressed or anything, but my mind was not in the right place to enjoy music. Before casting blame on external elements, I should’ve had an internal conversation with myself.

When was the last time you paid attention to your mind?

Excuse me, I need to go to play the piano now…